Some sort of RPG xD

1. You're walking across a fast food restaurant, when the mascot, some sort of large, yellow duck fish thing, tries to mug you. You-
A) Let him mug you. Go to 2)
B) You grab a nearby child and swing him around and around, knocking the yellow duck out. Go to 3)

2. You let him mug you. The duck blindly runs off into the street and gets hit by a bus. You seem unfazed, but soon an employee of the restaurant bursts out the door and looks at you accusingly and shocked. You:
A) Cry loudly and exclaim you didn't do it. Go to 4)
B) You look at him coldly before walking away. Go to 5)

3. You run away blindly in fear, before getting randomly hit by a bus. EPIC PHAIL

4. The employee doesn't believe you, and threatens to call the cops. You:
A) Repeatedly exclaim that you didn't do it, hoping to scare him off. Go to 6)
B) Tackle him. Go to 7)

5. He tackles you and grabs your neck. You can tell that he is about to make you bite the curb. You:
A) Push him off into the street. (8)
B) Let him. (9)

6. He becomes frightened and runs blindly in the street. A truck selling cream cheese hits him, and he dies. The cream cheese truck turns blindly to you. You:
A) Get out of the way. (10)
B) Do an Edward Cullen and push the truck away with your bare hands. (11)

7. He throws you off and runs off. You continue to walk away as if nothing happened, and at the age of 26 you marry a hot babe named Divona, raise two kids for 10 years before realizing that they are not yours but your brother's, which led to your taking up booze, having a secret affair with your secretary and working late night shifts. One day you catch Divona and your bro in the act, and you blindly shoot them before running blindly to the street and getting hit by a truck. EPIC PHAIL

8. He gets hit by a bus. CONGRATULATIONS, YOU JERK. EPIC PHAIL.

9. You die. What the cupcake were you thinking?! EPIC PHAIL.

10. You survive. You continue to walk away as if nothing happened, and at the age of 26 you marry a hot babe named Divona, raise two kids for 10 years before realizing that they are not yours but your brother's, which led to your taking up booze, having a secret affair with your secretary and working late night shifts. One day you catch Divona and your bro in the act, and you blindly shoot them before running blindly to the street and getting hit by a truck. EPIC PHAIL

11. You die. What the cupcake were you thinking?! Edward Cullen doesn't exist, you silly goose!!! EPIC PHAIL.

EPIC END. :P